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Open My Eyes

Written by Katie Larin on Friday of the Second Week of Lent

Open my eyes, Lord. Help me to see your face. Open my eyes, Lord. Help me to see.

I am currently in the Dominican Republic, serving on Alternative Spring Break. This week’s theme is “Now is the time to see.” I could not think of a better theme for this week of service. As I encounter new people and communities, people who live lives drastically different from my own, I must remember to see first.

Have you ever looked at someone and thought that you had them figured out? I’m definitely guilty of this. I’ll look at classmates in a lecture hall, friends on campus, or even families at St. Mary’s, and project my own thoughts on them. Sometimes I’ll think, “That person has the perfect life, or that couple must have the most amazing marriage – they would never have trouble or flaws.” Other times, I’ll do the opposite. I’ll assume that the person sitting on the street suffers from addiction and therefore needs help from others, or that the driver who just cut me off is innately spiteful.

In these times, I’m looking, but I’m not seeing. And I’m definitely not taking the time to understand.

To truly open my eyes to the reality of others, I must see as Jesus sees. And in order to see as Jesus sees, I need to ask for the grace to love as Jesus loves. Only in love can we begin to understand another’s experiences. Only in love can we see each person as a child of our Father.

As I have prayed about the trip, one song in particular has continued to play in my head: “Open My Eyes,” from the Voices as One book. I invite you to listen to this song, and think about the ways your eyes could be opened, ways you could love like Jesus and see God’s face, in places we’d never known.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eo6gZAUuQ3E]

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Katie Larin
Katie is a senior at the University of Michigan, majoring in Organizational Studies. She is the current Outreach and Engagement Intern, and plans to do a year of service after graduation.
Email: [email protected]

In God’s Loving Gaze

Written by Kelly Dunlop on Thursday of the Second Week of Lent

11pm. 1:10am. 3am. 5:20am. I swore I had only just shut my eyes when the cry began again, sending pangs of anxiousness through my body and necessitating my need to get up. I rolled over to sit on the edge of the bed completely sleep deprived and feeling desperate in a pile of tears.

“I’m not sure I can do this,” I thought to myself.

“How will I get through another day?”

I stumbled to her room to embrace all 8lbs of my little girl. In a zombie like state I made our way to the Lazy boy to nurse. And it was there, in a quiet moment of rocking together in the still wee hours of the morning when our eyes met and locked in with one another, that I was transfigured.

The first few weeks of life, an infant cannot focus much more than a foot in front of them- nearly equal from the breast to the eyes- and researchers have found that as a child gazes upon his/her mother and a mother on their child the brain produces a surge of oxytocin, the love hormone, in both of them. Miraculous. As I gazed into my daughter’s eyes and she back into mine I was completely comfortable, resulting in a deep internal peace and holistic sense of self in the truest sense. How seldom it is that we stare into the eyes of another for any prolonged time, even those we care for most deeply, without pulling away slightly embarrassed or uncomfortable. It was in that mundane and yet sacred moment, that I knew my own belovedness because I saw and felt it gazing back at me.

“This is my beloved Son. Listen to him. “

So often I get caught up in the “Lenten stuff”- the ashes, no meat on Fridays, give up this; give away more; follow the rules and recite the lines. Yet God invites all of us in this sacred time of preparation to rest in God’s loving gaze, with complete vulnerability and to know Him and be known in the most profound way.

Questions for Reflection:
Who are the people in your life whose relationship with God illumines their way of seeing other people and events? What have they taught you?
In what ways are you aware of your own limited vision? What blocks you from seeing more to life than routine or burden?

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Kelly Dunlop
Kelly was delighted to join the campus ministry staff at St. Mary’s in 2011. Before coming to St. Mary’s, Kelly was the associate director for social justice at the Newman Parish at her alumnus the University of North Carolina in Chapel Hill where she studied psychology (’02) and social work (’05). While her heart still bleeds Carolina Blue, she and her family (husband Paul and children Conor and Erin) have truly come to find a home in Ann Arbor.
Email: [email protected]

Finding Meaning in Service

Written by Jon Perry on Wednesday of the Second Week of Lent

As Spring break approaches, preparations are being made for cross country trips to beautiful vacation spots and back home for some home cooking. I am preparing mentally and spiritually for a whole other type of break.  I have the great privilege to be able to travel to Baltimore, Maryland and serve the community there through the Alternative Spring Break program here at St. Mary. This will be my second ASB experience, as last year I traveled to Meridian, Mississippi to work in conjunction with Habitat for Humanity and help rebuild a home for an elderly man.

This opportunity is not new to me, as my faith life has been closely tied with service since very early in my life. From a young age, I was raised in a typical Catholic home and have always attended Sunday Mass and been around my parish several times a week. Throughout grade school and then fully in to high school, I was involved in my parish’s youth group, which was heavily predicated on service. Additionally, I was a member of the National Honor Society where further service opportunities were made available to me.

Up until that point, service was always a great way to give back and use my time in a very proactive and good way. However, when I came to study here at the University of Michigan, I no longer had the opportunity to serve within my youth group or NHS. Without the daily option to serve others, I realized how much of an impact the act of service had on me. I have been extremely blessed again to have found the Service Fraternity Alpha Phi Omega, in addition to St. Mary’s where I can serve others. But this wasn’t all, I have found, through my growth spiritually with God, that the service to others is just as much a blessing for those serving as it is to those being served. Service isn’t just an activity, it’s a lifestyle.

Question for Reflection & Suggestion for Prayer:
How has service impacted your life and what does it mean to you?
Have a conversation with God about how he wants you to serve others.

Jon Perry
Jon is a sophomore studying Sport Management within the School of Kinesiology. In addition to being involved at St. Mary Student Parish, he is a member of the service fraternity Alpha Phi Omega and the student group Students Helping Honduras.  He works in the sports section at WOLV TV and plays on the U of M Club Baseball team.
Email: [email protected]

Seeing in the Dark

Written by Sharon Diotte on Tuesday of the Second Week of Lent

One of the many delights of retirement is the release from the constraints of the clock, especially when it comes to sleep. I’m often awake for an hour or two in the middle of the night. Other elder women tell me they too experience this interrupted sleep pattern. When we were younger, such interruptions in sleep were bothersome, resulting in lowered energy on the job the next day, but when we don’t have to get up early for work or child care in the morning, waking up in the middle of the night becomes a relaxed God call.

When I awake during the night, I give myself a chance to drift back into dream space. After fifteen minutes or so, if I’m still awake, I move to the small sofa in my office to sit with God. My office is my special God space in my home: photos of my ancestors and my children line the walls with small vases of fresh flowers honoring my parents and grandparents. An altar with images of Jesus and the Blessed Mother sits in one corner. The colors and textures of my God room are especially soothing for me. Always, upon entering this room, I feel deeply calmed and nourished.

Prayer time in the dark of the night, when the veil between the worlds is thinned, is a time of silent surrender. In this setting, my attention slides easily from my head down into my torso where God waits lovingly within me. This is a time to simply sit in the presence of God within. There are no thoughts, only an empty listening, an empty watching, an empty readiness. In this dark space of surrender, transformation happens. I am no longer my body or my personality or the events of my life. I am more. I am eternal. I Am.

Questions for Reflection:
Do you have a special God place in your home? If not yet, what would that space look like?
As you prepare to resurrect in Christ can you gift yourself with a consistent time to sit silently with your inner I AM?

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Sharon Diotte
Sharon is a retired parishioner at St. Mary Student Parish.
Contact: [email protected]

Seeing as Jesus Sees

Written by Setrak Haroutounian on Monday of the Second Week of Lent

Today’s Gospel reading from St. Luke (6:36-38) makes me uncomfortable, because I stink at this stuff. Right before this passage we get the famous Golden Rule and “love thine enemies” verses we know so well. Jesus then calls us to be compassionate, nonjudgmental givers and forgivers, “because the standard you use will be the standard used for you.” And then in verse 46, he tells us that it does no good to profess faith if we don’t live it. This is some serious language that Jesus is putting before us. He doesn’t ask us to believe that everything humans do is acceptable or good, but to consider our own selves when we would perhaps be quick to judge out of arrogance or blindness – when we might jump to conclusions or make assumptions.

I’ve discovered that the sinner in me is amazingly terrible at seeing life through another’s eyes. To live the way Jesus seems to be challenging us to, we have to see each other through this same lens: we are all created by God, loved and redeemed by Jesus. Curious, right? To see each other as the diverse, individual, unique, beloved creation that we each are, we have to focus on a common identity.

“Identity” has become a popular idea in the social and academic world, and people are challenged to define how they see themselves, or “identify,” while being sensitive to the identities others choose for themselves. There’s something noble about this movement, but Jesus seems to point to something a little different than this self-discerning. He is given his identity from the Father: “You are my beloved Son,” and he in-turn gives us our identity: children of God, light of the world, salt of the earth. Jesus scandalously looks past human differences because he uses a lens that recognizes the true, authentic identity of everyone – each person for whom he died and rose.

Today, ask yourself these hard-hitting questions: Will I choose to see every person I encounter today the way Jesus sees them? Will I see myself the way Jesus sees me? Then, go wrestle with your answers all day long.

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Setrak Haroutounian
Setrak is a half-Armenian, half-Southern guy who somehow ended up in frosty Michigan. He’s a sinner, coffee drinker, and a master’s student studying Education Leadership and Policy, graduating in 2015.
Email: [email protected]

Keep My Eyes to Serve

Written by Christine Convery on the Second Sunday of Lent

Two years ago, on my senior alternative spring break trip to Wheeling, WV, my group spent a day walking part of the Warrior Trail in Green County, PA.  As we painted yellow circles to mark the 5,000 year old trail first cut by Native Americans, we got to see up close the mountain resources that have resulted in economic boom and bust for this region of the country. Old coal plants, slurry pools, and fracking sites interrupted the otherwise pristine natural setting, along with a few isolated homes and farms. On this Appalachian trail, I had a mountain-top experience: an encounter with a God of the rural poor proclaiming “These are my beloved people. Listen to them.”

The trip down from the mountain becomes the hard part. Like Peter in the story of the transfiguration, I often have a short-lived and misdirected enthusiasm after such experiences and I want to stay on the mountain top forever. But coming home, from service or retreat or an enlightening encounter, is when I get to answer God’s call. How can I sustain an active and joyful spiritual life? How do I serve God and others in the mundane tasks of graduate school? Where do I see the face of God revealed to me on the streets of Ann Arbor? What does it mean to be transfigured? To be resurrected from the dead?

In my life today, I am faced with decisions and uncertainty about career paths and relationships and life plans. I am finished with ASB trips; instead I have the chance to serve in my own neighborhood and my own community. I don’t have an Appalachian vista inspiring me to open up to God’s call, but I do have the transformative presence of Christ in the Eucharist and in my neighbors. There is no audible voice of God, but today I hear Christ’s message and my prayer in the words of Mumford & Sons: “Keep the earth below my feet…Keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn.”

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEJ-v3n0qkw]

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Christine Convery
Christine is a master’s student in the University of Michigan’s School of Public Health.  She served as the undergraduate intern for retreats at St. Mary Student Parish for the 2012-13 academic year and graduated from U of M in 2013.
Email: [email protected]

God’s Voice in the Words of Others

Written by Andrew Brown on Saturday of the First Week of Lent

Studying social work in St. Louis among everything that has been happening in Ferguson (a suburb just north of the city) has been a powerful and challenging experience. Personally, I have felt called to participate in protests and stand in solidarity with the Black Lives Matter movement. Others have chosen to take various different stances. Amidst all of this diversity of opinion, I am deeply concerned about a troubling dynamic that I have witnessed and sometimes participated in.

I feel very strongly about my own perspective, and I have met many others with different stances that are equally passionate. These differences of opinion create a wonderful opportunity for dialogue and a deepened understanding of how God can work through us to solve complex social injustices and make us more loving and unified. Unfortunately, many people, including me, miss these valuable opportunities. I am guilty of creating inflammatory social media posts, judging people with different perspectives than me, and prioritizing making my opinion heard over actively listening to others.

Jesus’ example of silence in the desert is an example for me this Lent. I want to challenge myself to prioritize listening, even when the person I’m listening to makes me feel angry, confused, or hurt. I feel strongly about my own beliefs and values because I genuinely believe that God has guided me to those values. When I discuss difficult topics with others, I want to challenge myself to respect that their beliefs come from the same place of sincere reflection and thought.

Listening in this way is not a threat to my own beliefs. It will help me clarify and deepen my beliefs. I cannot assume that I have the right answer, particularly regarding complex issues. By engaging sincerely and earnestly with others with a real intention to listen, I open myself up to the possibility of hearing God’s voice through meaningful conversation.

Questions for Reflection:
Think about a time when you heard God’s voice in a discussion. What was that like? What about the conversation made you feel God’s presence?
How can you seek opportunities to listen for God’s voice in the words of others?

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Andrew Brown
Andrew is a 2^nd year Master of Social Work student studying Social and Economic Development at Washington University in St. Louis. He graduated with his BA from the University of Michigan in 2012 and served as a Peer Minister at St. Mary Student Parish for the 2012-13 academic year.
Email: [email protected]

*Ferguson photo taken by Chris Ahrens

Ready to Listen

Written by Colleen McClain on Thursday of the First Week of Lent

“[God’s] will for us was the twenty-four hours of each day: the people, the places, the circumstances he set before us in that time. Those were the things God knew were important to him and to us at that moment… The trick is to learn to see that—not just in theory, or not just occasionally in a flash of insight granted by God’s grace, but every day.”     – Jesuit Fr. Walter Ciszek

There are times when God’s voice is unmistakable; even then, it can be difficult to listen. I left for fall retreat exhausted amidst year two of graduate school, my personal and professional life moving faster than I could reflect upon.

The chapel was quiet as we moved around its perimeter, praying the Stations. As we reached the twelfth—Jesus dies—a rush of air blew through the rafters. Whether others heard it, I don’t know. But I prayed that weekend to hear Him more clearly in returning to “normal” life. Quickly, though, daily stressors closed in.

Yet I’m grateful that God works in ways that are not ours: Even when I let His voice seem faint, it remains a constant whisper of truth in each day. As I sat with fellow parishioners on Ash Wednesday, I heard God simply and profoundly. My realization:

This Lent will change me, if I let it.

It will transform me in ways I desperately long for and those only God knows I need. But the first step is mine in our covenant: Be aware of God’s presence. Not only when it’s easy, when surrounded by believers, or when things are great; in the subzero walk to class, when fears take over, and in every frustration and triumph.

I pray for strength in that journey. True, active listening is difficult. It requires openness in moments I’d rather crawl under a rock or believe my way is best.

And it’s terrifying—but beautiful—as vulnerability in any relationship is.

I’m fully aware of challenges ahead. But I know that as I continue to hear Him, my heart will grow strong and supple. I’m grateful Jesus meets me in struggles and fears, embracing me for them. As my mind turns to “what-ifs,” he says: Listen.

Pope Francis asks us to let our hearts “be pierced by the Spirit, so as to bring love along the roads that lead to our brothers and sisters.” Christ walks with us along these roads, speaking within and through us; awaiting the moment we begin not by talking, but by listening.

I’m ready to listen; to say yes; to be changed.

Questions for Reflection: 
When do you find it hardest to listen for God’s voice?
Pray the Examen and be aware of God’s presence. What is He saying to you?

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Colleen McClain
Colleen is a second-year graduate student in the Michigan Program in Survey Methodology, and a member of the graduate student/young professional and Small Church Community lead teams at St. Mary Student Parish. She has been a resident of Ann Arbor for ten years and can’t overstate the impact St. Mary has had on her life.
Email: [email protected]